So this morning I was relaxing on my favourite rug while Dad was in another room doing some work on his computer. Molly was sniffing around looking for trouble when all of a sudden something out the window caught the old Hound-girl’s eye. She got up on her rear legs and put her front paws on the window sill and started bellowing at the top of her lungs, “Hawg! Hawg! Dang Hawgs!” Honestly, I didn’t know what the heck she was on about. Soon enough Dad came running over, took a look out the window and sized up the situation. He picked up Molly and carried her over to the kitchen. I won’t repeat the things she said while he was carrying her off but let’s just say that she was not impressed. After ensuring that Molly was secured in the kitchen Dad went outside and asked me to follow him. I didn’t know where we were going but it was clear that Dad knew it required the skills of an Alaskan Malamute, namely yours truly.
Out on the back deck, Dad and I surveyed the spectacle. Here’s the dog’s eye view I captured:
Yes it was two little pigs! This is not a sight that you see every day so Dad and I watched them intently as they walked out of sight up behind the guesthouse where my brother Clifford lives. As soon as they disappeared from view we took off to meet up with them!
As you can see, I had a good chat with these two young gents and it turns out they had left the comfort of their home to find themselves some female companionship. You may think I am kidding about this but Dad confirmed their story later on when he called up the farm across the road to see if they were missing a couple of residents. The lady who spoke to Dad said that they sure might be theirs and that they were likely out looking for girls and would no doubt find their way home. Now our property is pretty big and we didn’t want these little guys to get lost so we figured we had better give them a few pointers. Dad called me to come inside and of course I immediately followed him and was complimented for being such a good boy. Dad said if it was Molly, she’d be outside going crazy and following that that fool nose of hers and the only way to get her in would be to scoop her up and take her inside.
So Dad and I went out on the property and searched for the two porky bachelors and soon enough we spotted them.
We called them over and after a short round table the two little pigs agreed that they should probably make their way home as there were clearly no girl pigs to be found in the vicinity. So off we went down our driveway.
Now if you’ve just got little trotters to walk on, as opposed to big snowshoe paws like a Malamute, a lot of walking on gravel can be tough so at one point these fellas had to stop for a pint or two.
After a couple of rounds of refreshments and some fascinating discourse on pork futures, we resumed our trek.
This is possibly my longest blog post to date so I’ll just cut to the chase here and let you know that we didn’t escort these little guys all the way home. They clearly knew where they were going and we didn’t want them to think that we doubted their navigational skills. After all, pigs are really smart and they’ve got finely honed sniffers. From what Dad said they are probably at home right now searching the Internet and trying to figure out where all the lady hogs are congregating out in our neck of the woods.
